Happiness = Downsizing

 

As you may know, Lent is right around the corner. From my childhood in Catholic School I was trained to “give something up for Lent”. But what? What should I give up now that would truly benefit me in my relationship to God and to other people? There are many things I could do to improve my health, my prayer life, and my mind. I could read more, exercise more, and spend more time in prayerful meditation but this year I KNOW I need to find something to GIVE UP. I found this parable by Fr Anthony de Mello that should help:

An American, on his last day of a trip to India, was idly shopping in the Bombay marketplace. As he strolled from stall to stall he noticed a beggar sitting on the ground with a few dust covered trinkets spread out on a blanket before him. Curious, the American walked over to get a closer look. He was quickly drawn to several dust covered, almond sized items that glimmered in the sun. The beggar motioned for him to pick them up and take a closer look. When he did his heart stopped. These were not worthless trinkets - they were diamonds!

“Don’t look to eager,” the tourist cautioned himself, but the shrewd beggar noticed his customer’s heightened tension instantly. So when the tourist feigned disinterest and casually offered $10 the beggar shook his head. He really wanted those diamonds but he did not want to pay too much so he finally said “Well, I’m not that sure I want them, but I’ll give you $25 - that’s my final price.” The beggar shook his head again and said “that’s way too low”. The tourist finally asked how much he would take. The beggar said, “I can see that you admire these stones very much. Please take them.” The tourist was stunned. “I can’t just take them from you”, he protested. The beggar insisted and the tourist finally relented, stuffing the diamonds in his coat pocket.

Hurriedly, he made a bee-line for his hotel. Suddenly, he was very aware of all of the pick-pockets who were staring at him from behind every corner. When he got to the hotel he was going to put the items in the safe but he knew he couldn’t trust the clerk. Finally in his room, the tourist double bolted the door. He looked frantically around the room for a place to hide his precious stones. The American finally decided to just keep them on his person - that would be the safest. As he laid on his bed he thought of all the things he could purchase when he sold these big rocks. His heart was pumping with anticipation but he was filled with fear because he was sure someone would break into his room and steal his stones.

After spending a sleepless night, he finally arose early in the morning to get ready for his trip back to America. He carefully packed all of his things and, after checking out of his hotel, went back to the market. He wandered, dazed and desperate, until he found what he was looking for. The beggar was sitting cross-legged on the ground in the same place he had been the day before.

“Hello, my friend!”, smiled the beggar.

The American anxiously dug into his pocket and took out the stones, handing them back to the humble Indian.

“But, my friend, you were so happy with these stones yesterday”, said the beggar evenly.

“Yes, yes, I was. But I have learned something. I have learned that the stones, as you call them, are not so important. I thought they would make me happy but instead they made me miserable. Now I realize that what would really make me happy is to have the power that YOU have within you - the power to give them up so effortlessly.”

The point is simple: you cannot add things to your life to make yourself happy. As I have added things to my own life they surely have NOT made me happier. Usually, it turns out a little like the tourist in the parable. Now that I have this new thing where will I keep it? How will I maintain it? How can I keep it safe and secure? Should I buy the extended warranty? Should I tell anyone I have it? - and on an on.

It seems that if I want to be truly happy I need to SUBTRACT things from my life. Simplifying, rather that complicating, is the key! And so that will be my Lenten journey this year - elimination, closet cleaning, tossing things out, donations to the St Vincent Store etc., etc.

What about you? Where do you see the need to downsize and simplify your life? Are there things that cause you stress, worry, too much space, etc.? Lent begins March 5th this year. Use it to exercise the virtue mentioned in the parable by having the power to give "valuable" things away effortlessly.

National Marriage Week

This is National Marriage Week! The Catholic Church and other churches and agencies are asking us to pray for and to encourage married and engaged couples. I realize that our society does not value marriage as it once did but that doesn't mean that marriage is not important. Strong marriages have the power to change to world for the better. As they live out their vows to one another in love and in sacrifice the married couple blesses their community by raising good kids, supporting one-another fiscally, emotionally and physically, and by serving their community in beneficial ways.
On the other hand, a bad or broken marriage can change the world, too. Much emotional, financial and family damage can come from broken marriages. It is estimated that as many as 80% of the inmates in prisons come from broken families. I visit our Juvenile Detention Center every Monday evening and have been doing so for over four years. I have visited hundreds of kids and I can tell that less then 20 of them came from a home that had both biological parents.
If you are a person who likes a fiscally responsible government you should support, pray for and encourage strong marriages. When marriages end, the local, state, county, and federal governments are often called on to supplement the situation financially. But the real reason to support good marriages is because they are good for the couple, the children and the society. John Paul II is quoted as saying "the future of humanity depends on marriage and the family". WOW! Marriage is important.
What do we do? Encourage engaged couples to seek good pre-marriage preparation at their church or from a trained professional. Work for laws that support marriage and family. Discourage people from living together prior to marriage - the divorce rate is about 45% higher for those couples who do so. Pray, pray, pray that God's grace will be the glue the holds couples together through difficult and trying times.
Are you married or thinking about getting married? Check out this website: www.foryourmarriage.org 

Eliminate destitution through poverty?

Yesterday (2/5), Pope Francis sent out his message for Lent, 2014. I have read it a couple of times and feel challenged and inspired by his thoughts. He challenges ALL persons to do whatever is possible to alleviate physical, moral, and spiritual destitution in our world. The challenge is this: he wants us to do it out of our poverty and not out of our wealth! That is inspiring since most us do not possess great wealth - but all of us can contribute sacrificially from our "poverty". He recommends we do that by imitating Jesus Christ who "though He was rich, yet for our sakes became poor, so that by his poverty we might become rich" (2Cor 8:9). If you think about it, God could have saved us out of His Divine Wealth but instead he brought us salvation by taking on our nature (becoming poor). Pope Francis says we need to imitate Jesus if our efforts in eliminating destitution are going to be effective. Here is a portion of his message:

In imitation of our Master, we Christians are called to confront the poverty of our brothers and sisters, to touch it, to make it our own and to take practical steps to alleviate it. Destitution is not the same as poverty: destitution is poverty without faith, without support, without hope. There are three types of destitution: material, moral and spiritual. Material destitution is what is normally called poverty, and affects those living in conditions opposed to human dignity: those who lack basic rights and needs such as food, water, hygiene, work and the opportunity to develop and grow culturally. In response to this destitution, the Church offers her help, her diakonia, in meeting these needs and binding these wounds which disfigure the face of humanity. In the poor and outcast we see Christ’s face; by loving and helping the poor, we love and serve Christ. Our efforts are also directed to ending violations of human dignity, discrimination and abuse in the world, for these are so often the cause of destitution. When power, luxury and money become idols, they take priority over the need for a fair distribution of wealth. Our consciences thus need to be converted to justice, equality, simplicity and sharing.

 I recommend you read the whole thing (about 10 minutes worth) by clicking here.

What on earth am I doing here????

One of the ministries I am involved in is to teenagers who are in trouble. These young men and women are usually locked up because of alcohol and/or drug use, running away, or because they are simply in need of supervision and the State does not know what to do with them. As my partner and I meet with them we often ask "What on earth are you doing here?" This does not mean "why are you locked up", it means "what could/should you be doing with your life?" Most of these teens have never considered where life may be leading them and how their choices are effecting their options. We encourage them to keep asking themselves the question "What on earth am I doing here?". We recommend that they take that question to God each and every night before they go to sleep and then spend a few moments in silence - just in case God might want to give them an answer. That way they will (hopefully) make choices that lead them to a life of fulfillment, true freedom and peace.
What about you? What on earth on you doing here? Do you have a sense of purpose and/or vocation in your life? The little tricolor illustration above is a good way to evaluate your self. YOU may have an idea of what you want to do with life - that's the yellow circle. As you consider your own talents and desires you may feel led in a particular direction. The blue circle we will call "other people and circumstances". You may have close friends or family members who advise you or encourage you to choose a certain path. But you must also consider the "circumstances" of your life. Not every path is open to every person due to education, location, skill, talent, etc. The Red circle is God. It can be difficult to hear the "still, small voice" of God in our culture. Prayer and listening is ESSENTIAL! Spend some quality time with God today and make a habit of spending at least 5 minutes with God EVERYDAY. God's advice to us in Scripture is to "be still and know" (Psalm 46). Begin today and allow your Maker to assist you in discerning your calling.

Obsessed? Who's obsessed?

Obsession is a word used frequently in our society today. There seems to be a growing obsession with being obsessed, you might say.  The Merriam-Webster online Dictionary defines the word as “a persistent disturbing preoccupation with an often unreasonable idea or feeling”. There are other definitions given as well but this is the first one listed. Words to note in that definition are “preoccupation” and “unreasonable”.

Do you know people who are obsessed with something? Could you be described as a person with an obsession? In our day, people get obsessed with Facebook, video games, sports, technology, and so on. While these seem like innocent obsessions, they can become harmful when they interrupt normal human interaction and preoccupy the person constantly. People also get obsessed about more disturbing things like drugs or pornography. These obsessions can rise to the level of addiction and they not only damage the person, these obsessions can have very negative social consequences.

Sometimes the Catholic Church is accused of having an obsession about abortion but I would disagree with that. Going back to the definition of obsession, I don’t think the way our Church treats abortion is a “disturbing preoccupation” nor is it “unreasonable”. If our Church were preoccupied with abortion you would be hearing about it CONSTANTLY. It would be the subject of nearly every homily, bulletin article and newsletter. But  that simply is not true, is it? Most of us hear a homily on the topic of abortion once or twice per year. We may never hear one on artificial contraception, embryonic stem cell research or other issues related to the earliest stages of life.

In a recent interview with the Boston Globe, Cardinal Sean O’Malley had this to say:

“The normal Catholic in the parish might hear a sermon on abortion once a year. They’ll never hear a sermon on homosexuality or gay marriage. They’ll never hear a sermon about contraception. But if you look at the New York Times, in the course of a week, there will be 20 articles on those topics. So who is obsessed? Now, the Church’s positions are very clear and very consistent. For us, life is at the very center of our social teachings. Life is precious. It is a mystery. It must be nurtured, protected, the transmission of life is sacred. And our defense of human life is a great service to society. When the state begins to decide who is worthy of living and who isn’t, all human rights are put in jeopardy, but the voice of the church is very clear. And we’re not just saying that life is precious in the womb but life is precious when someone has Alzheimer’s when someone has AIDS when someone is poor when someone has mental illness. Their humanity is not diminished – and they have a claim on our love and on our services. So the church’s position is a very consistent one. It is a consistent life ethic. I don’t think that we are obsessed, however, when the New York Times is writing 20 articles a week about these things and make reference to the Church in half of those articles, it gives the impression. But I think in the parishes, these things are talks, in a routine way, in CCD classes, along with the rest of the Catholic doctrine but all of our teachings fit together. They’re part of a whole. There’s a consistency in our life ethic.”

I don’t know about you, but I like that statement. It very clearly states that, as Catholics, we are respecters of life at absolutely every stage, that we honor and protect human life as sacred - no matter what.

I am writing this article on Wednesday, January 22nd, the 41st Anniversary of the legalization of abortion in the United States. Yes, our Church still prays, marches, and stands against that decision. We hope beyond all hope that the hearts of the people in our country can be changed so that life can be seen as the gift it truly is. We love every person regardless of their “stage” of life or state in life be it in the womb, in the prison, in the nursing home, the intensive care unit or in a hospice facility. We serve people in need with food, health care, clothing, shelter, counseling and a plethora of other services designed to enhance their human dignity. These are the things that make me proud to be Catholic.

If that means I am obsessed then so be it!

To kill or not to kill?...

If you live in South Dakota you should know that there will be a bill introduced in this legislative session entitled "An Act to Repeal the Death Penalty as it Applies to All Prospective Homicides". It has not been introduced yet and all that is available is a draft copy. In this form it is a very simple bill - it reclassifies 1st Degree Murder as a Class B felony thereby taking the death penalty off the table of sentencing options.
This bill is being introduced by a man who was a strong supporter of the death penalty at one time, Rep. Steve Hickey. In a recent article with KELO TV he said that he changed his mind after realizing that the death penalty is not a deterrent, does not save the state money and does not increase public safety.
I would like to state my support for this action to repeal the death penalty. Besides the reasons that Rep. Hickey states I would add that we do not have the right to take life  - that responsibility rests with God and with God alone. Certainly, state and local governments are responsible for public safety and need to do what they can to protect us from dangerous individuals. Fortunately, we have the means to do that in our state prison system. Killing an individual does nothing to enhance the state's ability to ensure the safety of the people. (There was an unfortunate incident in the Sioux Falls penitentiary recently where a guard was killed by men serving sentences for terrible crimes. If I understand what has been reported about that incident it seems that protocols and policies were not followed. If they had been these men would never have had the chance to kill this public servant.)
Naturally, I could go on and on with many other reasons of my own but I would rather hear from you. So...

Where do you stand? - and why? - please weigh in!

Immigration, immigration. What's a Deacon to do?

As a person who grew up with strong politically conservative views my opinions on immigration (legal and illegal) were quite strict. It seemed to me that migrants were just going to be a burden on our economic, governmental and social structures. As a lawful society we should simply round up these "illegals" and get them shipped out - and do it quickly.
But then something happened that I didn't expect. Through my ministry in the jails, detention centers, homeless shelters, and prisons I started meeting some "illegals" face-to-face. Their stories are much different than the stereotype I had in my mind. I thought they just came to the United States to take jobs from our people, to take advantage of our health-care, and become a drain on our welfare systems. The reality (at least for most) is quite different. Many were brought here as infants or young children with their parents. They have lived here most of their lives and really have no connection to another country. Their parents came here to escape a severe poverty and economic situation that left them no opportunity to even feed their children. Most work in menial jobs and are paid in cash at a wage that is much below the minimum. If they are caught they are held in jail and then (usually) deported to their home country. Often this leaves their spouse and children here with no means of support.
I guess the point I am trying to make is this: The problem is NOT a simple one, it is a HUMAN one and therefore demands a humane response - especially from the Catholic Church and from all Christians. Certainly, we should do our best to know who is entering our country and what their intentions are and that's the job of the people hired to regulate the borders.  But just as certainly we need to realize that ALL persons in the world are our brothers and sisters in Christ regardless of their migration status and that's our job. In the Catholic Church we call this the principle of Solidarity. Obviously, these people need help and assistance and an understanding response from us.
At this time of year it may be beneficial to remember that Mary and Joseph had to flee from their home country and enter a foreign land to protect Jesus from an unjust ruler. We can assume they found people willing to take them in and give them a helping hand. In assisting or denying the "strangers among us" today we are saying "yes or no" to Jesus, himself (Mt 25: 31-46). 
I realize that this is an emotional and political hot button issue. Please leave your thoughts in the comments section.